According to Ainsley #5 - I Can't Believe I Did This!

"Ainsley it's bed time, pick up your blocks please," Clif instructs while flipping through the channels.

"Not yet," Ainsley answers.  This is one of her favorite answers these days.

"Yes Ainsley, it's time to go to bed."

"I said, not yet."

Clif looks at me like can you help please? But I am very busy stalking Twitter and commenting on blog posts.  So I half-heartedly say, "Ainsley pick up your blocks."

"Mommy, I can't do it.  I am too small."

This catches my attention.

"Ainsley do it now, or I'll throw your toys away instead of allowing you to clean them up."  I am all tough and straight to the point when I am engrossed in the laptop.

"Ohhhkaaaay" She sighs.

And then she begins singing under her breath.  I can't really make out her words, but it's something about cleaning the blocks.

Then...

"I CAN'T BELIEVE I DID THIS!!!"

I stop typing and listen.

"I put the wrong thing in there.  That does not go there.  I can't believe I did this..." She stops and realizes what she's said.  See my daughter?  Has a super huge ridiculous small obsession with the movie Tangled.  And in this movie, Rapunzel escapes her tower and the first thing she says is "I can't believe I did this!  I CAN'T BELIEVE I DID THIS!"

Immediatly, she is done cleaning and launches herself into the character of Rapunzel.  She is now in the zone.  Going through the lines that follow, complete with movement and expression.

Seriously?  Need to get this child an agent.



Double Folds

The mountain of freshly washed clothes are spilling out of the basket.  Pant legs twist around their pairs, while socks and shirts cling to one another. 

I sigh deeply and begin the long task in front of me, always thankful that I can do this chore while zoning out in front of the television.  Not so grateful that my son is now a toddler and life's mission is to make me refold the same shirt 8 times.

Like always I make four distinct piles: mine, Clif's, Ainsley's and Freddie's.

I fold shirts and tuck socks until my wrists and arms are sore, all the while sorting the piles and catching up on the latest episode of Modern Family.

I take each pile to it's respective room and put the clothes in the appropriate drawers.

Ainsley's are last.  Mostly shirts, dresses and shorts.  But at the bottom of the pile, when all others are put away, I find a lone pair of jeans.

I stop and stare at these little pants and for some reason my eyes well.  They're double folded.  I hadn't realized when I was folding, but there they sit with two folds instead of one.

I always double fold my and Clif's pants.  It keeps them shorter and fitting in the pile neater.  But the kids pants?  They're already short and small and fit nicely in their piles.

Apparently, not the case anymore.  I did it on auto pilot but now they sit, staring at me, reminding me that she's not a baby or toddler anymore.   She's a big girl.  With tall, lean big girl legs.  That only fit in long, double folded big girl pants.

I blink back the dampness in my eyes and scold myself for being so silly.  Laundry?  I'm getting all emotional about laundry?  What is wrong with me?

I pause a moment, wondering if I've missed other things while on auto pilot.  This laundry episode has shown me how life can jump.  I've watched her grow up for almost 4 years, but all of the sudden these double folded pants make me realize how big she is.  I shake the jeans out of their fold and hold them up against my body.  Before I know it, she'll be borrowing my clothes.

How has it gone by so fast?

I fold them in half, then over and over again.  Double folded.  I slip them into the drawer, where they fit perfectly.

A Bubble of a Different Color

Dear Grandma,

Mommy took us outside to play with our bubbles tonight.  Finally, Right?!?!?!  She's been putting it off forever.

The bubbles are awesome!  They are colored green and orange.  Who knew there were colored bubbles out there in the world!  What an amazing idea...taking bubbles and adding color.

When they burst, they splatter all over us.  At first we were a bit nervous with the mess, but once mommy said it was okay, we were all over it.

Oh, and Freddie's never really played with bubbles before.  He didn't really understand why he couldn't hold them like his other balls.

But he still had a lot of fun with them.

Thank you Grandma!  What a fun new way for us to make a mess.

And, yes, we do still have our jammies on at 6PM...it was kind of a lazy Sunday around here.

Love,

Ainsley and Freddie

According to Ainsley #4 - Mean Old Man

We spent a long weekend in Connecticut for Caitlyn's wedding.

Friday we spent a lot of time running around and at one point I ended up in a parking lot which was one way.  Meaning the two lanes that circled the parking lot were one way.  Having never been in this parking lot before, I did not realize this until I was going the wrong way on this one way circle.  Also, there was plenty of room for other cars to get by.

So I pulled up and waited for Amanda to put Ainsley in her car seat.  During this thirty seconds an older man walked up to my window - which was down - and said...

"Do you know you're going the wrong way on a one way street?" and before I could answer...
"What's wrong with you?  Can't you see?  Are you blind?"

Well then...sorry parking lot police.

We headed out of the parking lot and Ainsley sat quietly...for a few moments.

"Mommy?  What did that man say?"

"He just told me I was doing something wrong."

"That was a mean man!  Why is he a mean man?"

Amanda answered, "Some people are mean because they are not very happy."

Ainsley's eyes got wide and she said "That man was not happy!"

Then we all sat quietly again until Ainsley spoke again.  This time she used a deep, gruff voice and said, "Hey, you're going the wrong way.  You're going the WRONG WAY!!!"

That old man?  He was mean...and Ainsley? Way funny.

Those Girls

I am at my sister-in-law's wedding, sitting at my table, watching her bridesmaids own the dance floor.

I used to be one of those girls.  I used to drink and dance until the sun came up.  A wedding meant a party.  An opportunity to spend the evening with my friends drinking as much as possible until that last song seeped through the speakers.  Going out afterwards, refusing to end the celebration.  A gang of well dressed wedding guests descending on an already crowded bar. 

There are times that I look at my life and wonder how I got here.  Wasn't I just graduating from college?  Didn't I just meet Clif?  Don't I have amazing plans for this weekend?  Shouldn't I be thinking about a prom dress?

No.  The answer to all these questions is no.  I graduated from college so long ago, that on the eve of my graduation I was wearing overalls at the bar.  When was the last time you saw someone over the age of 2 wearing overalls? Clif and I have known each other for a decade. Yeah, that's 10 years. My weekends are no longer spent primping for a night out on the town.  Now I feel cool if I can stay awake for SNL.  The fact is, I am now closer to Ainsley's high school prom than I am to my own.

How did that happen?  How did I wake up one morning middle-aged, married, mother of two?  Life spins by out of control.  I feel like I'm missing things, forgetting things.  Sometimes I get so caught up in the idea of preserving every single moment, that years just whiz by unnoticed. 

So, I sit and watch these girls.  Watch them dancing and singing and laughing.  Their wine glasses rocking to the beat of the music.  The amber liquid coming dangerously close to splashing over the edge.  Those days for me are so vivid, yet so far away.  I can remember some of those moments with precise clarity, but in the same breath I can't remember the last time I danced the night away with a drink in my hand.

There are times when I long for that.  Wish for a carefree day.  A day spent lounging on the couch watching reality TV.  An evening passed with friends over a long dinner.  A sunrise watched after a long night of silliness and youth.

But...

I sit, with my small boy perched on my shoulder.  His slow, deep breaths confirming his slumber.  I watch my young daughter twirling in the middle of these girls.  Her blond locks flapping against her cheeks.

And honestly, I don't miss it.  I don't miss those nights.  Now I have patty-cake and peek-a-boo.  Dress up and dance class.  Morning songs and bedtime routines.  Dora and Raffi.  Stained onsies and tiny socks.  I wouldn't trade any of it to be one of those girls again.

And one day...maybe soon, maybe years from now...those girls will sit at a wedding, watching others and they'll smile thinking the same thing.

MIA...

People?  It's been a crazy week...I mean CRAZY and insane.  Nothing huge, just a lot of little things...and though I've started many posts, I have not had time to finish them.  So sorry, no posts from me this week...except this one with some lame ass excuses :)

Monday, we will be back in town, some shizz should be finished at work and - fingers crossed - children will be healthy.

So, hope you had a great week.  Hope the weekend is way better and we'll chat on Monday.

xoxo...

Warmer Weather Means...

Picking flowers...

Wagon rides...

Pedaling fast...

Long days at the playground...

Smiles from everyone...

According to Ainsley #3 - Reverse Psychology is BS

Ainsley, look at the camera.

Ainsley, can you smile for me?

Wait, Ainsley!  Turn around, look at the camera!

Come on Ainsley, will you please smile?

Never mind.  I don't want to take a picture of you.  Don't you dare smile.

Brat...

Apparently Kids Like Going to the Pool

I am not really a pool person.  Actually, I am not really a water person.  I do like going to the beach, but I like it more for the relaxation.  Sitting on the beach (fully sunblocked or umbrella'd), listening to the waves crash, reading a book or falling asleep.  That is awesome, although doesn't really happen now that I have kids at the beach with me.  And if someone who is really good at swimming, and possibly saving my life, is willing to go in the water with me, then I can enjoy that too.

But overall, I don't swim.  I wouldn't say that I'm afraid of the water.  I know that if I venture out in still water, I can most likely get back to whichever surface I came from.  Be it a boat, dock or pool side.

However, I am not confident in my ability to take care of small children in a water environment.  But really, that is not the point of my post.

The point is, that kids love the pool.  Since kids love the pool, we have joined a pool this summer.  This basically melds together three things I don't like - 1) Water with small children, 2) Sun exposure (I'm kind of a freak about sunblock.  Have you seen my children?  They're like ghosts.  They burn, I burn.), and 3) Wearing a bathing suit.

This late in the game...probably not learning to rescue small children from water.  So most likely, we will only be going to the pool with Clif.


The ghostly-ness of me and my children?  That I can do absolutely zero about.  I will be buying lots of sunblock.

However, I've decided to try and do something about the horridness of my body in a bathing suit.  So at least when I am sitting under some sort of shade structure watching my husband take care of my kids in the water, I can feel somewhat comfortable in the most un-revealing bathing suit I can find.



Do you think I could pull off this look?


So I present...What I'm doing to get bathing suit ready and healthy too!

1 - Walking.  My cousin, Elizabeth, has started a walking competition between a bunch of us.  I have a large family and we live all over the East coast, but we all bought pedometers and we're all trying to walk at least 10,000 steps a day.  Well, I was not on the ball and did not buy mine until Saturday.  So I started yesterday (a week behind everyone else)...but I walked 17,500 steps!!!  What?!?!  I couldn't believe it.

2 - Stairs.  I work on the 7th floor of a building.  I've always taken the elevator.  But I've decided, no more elevator.  Now I'm walking up and down stairs all day.  Up is way harder than down, but I've already noticed it getting a bit easier in just a week.

3 - Water.  I used to be so great at drinking water.  But I have floundered since taking this job.  Ice is the reason.  I love really cold water.  I mean, it needs to be almost icy for me to drink it all.  There is only one ice machine in the whole building.  Second floor.  Note above...I work on the 7th floor.  So I've been lazy.  But now with my whole attitude towards stairs and walking as much as possible...I drank 9 glasses of water yesterday!

4 - Food.  This is always my biggest weakness.  I. Love. Food!  I love so many different kinds of food.  The greasier, cheesier, breadier the better!  All bad things.  So I'm trying.  I refuse to "diet."  Really I'm just trying to make some healthier decisions.  I'm trying to eat less sugar (because apparently when I got pregnant with Freddie I also got a major sweet tooth).  I'm trying to eat at least 5 fruits and veggies a day.  And most important of all, portion control.  This is really the hardest part for me.  I have a huge...no HUGE appetite.  I can eat most people under the table.  Not really something I'm proud of, but unfortunately true.

5 - Play.  Since it's been nice, I've been trying to take the kids to the playground as much as possible.  It is at the top of my in-law's hill, half a mile away.  I put them in the wagon with their snacks and sippy cups and pull the 50+ pounds up the hill.  Then we play for 30-40 minutes.  And I'm trying to really play with them, not just watch.  I taught Ainsley tag, follow the leader and dodge ball.  So this is how I plan to get my exercise...since I no longer can find the time for 6 mile runs or hours on a treadmill.

So there you have it.  Are you doing anything to get your body ready for summer?