Tuesday, April 24, 2012

A Little Tuesday Morning Vent


I have a love/hate relationship with daycare.  In general, I think daycare is kinda great for kids.  I would have preferred not to have my kids in full time daycare as infants, but as toddlers and preschoolers I am behind it 100%.

I'm not sure that I'd want to be home 24/7 with two children.  So daycare allows me that.  My kids have walked early, talked early, fed themselves early...I would like to take all the credit for my amazing children, but I also know that daycare plays a role.  They are constantly around children of varying age and ability.  It pushes them to take that step early or ask for a drink early.

There are quite a few things about daycare that I don't like.  The kids are always sick.  I have very limited time with the kids.  Someone else gets to spend all day with them.  I don't get to know and see every detail of their daily routine.

However, at my specific daycare I have another issue.  The owner.  We don't mesh well.  Now, if my life had been normal over the last year and a half, I would have taken my kids out of this place.  Not because it's dirty, or unorganized, or that my kids aren't loved.  It is immaculately clean.  The owner is meticulous.  The owner and her staff love my children.  But she and I, we just don't always see eye to eye.  She doesn't deliberately defy me, but she often disagrees with me in an argumentative way.  She's not super professional.

For instance, Freddie bit a child a couple of months ago.  In the past, when I had the kids in a professionally run daycare center, if a kid was bit or did bite the parent heard about it.  But there were no names involved.  Ainsley got bit a few times, and I never knew who.  When Freddie bit a boy while they were playing (not out of anger or aggression), the owner told me about it in front of other mothers and told me who he bit.  It would stand to reason that she also told the mother of the bit child.  She then proceeded to ask me to "Please talk to him at home."  She wanted me to please talk to my 22 month old about biting?  Not when it actually happened, but hours later when we were home?  Hmmm...I just don't see that sticking.

I didn't like that she said anything in front of other mothers.  I don't want Freddie to be known as the kid that bites.  If one of those kids gets bit by another kid, I don't want them to assume it's Freddie. 

Just last night we had another altercation.  Over baby wipes.  I have always felt that this daycare uses WAY too many wipes.  I am constantly bringing them wipes, almost weekly.  Since I use cloth diapers, I clean them out when I get home.  Sometimes I find 10-15 wipes rolled up in a wet (non dirty) diaper.  That is insane!  I've never said anything, because I don't want to tell her how to run her business...but it does bother me.

On Thursday they asked for more wipes (shocker!).  Thursday was a busy night of laundry and packing for our weekend trip.  I didn't have time in my evening to run out to get wipes.  So I gave her what I had at home.  A half pack of wipes.  It was on my mental list to get more this week.  These wipes should have lasted 2-3 days.

Yesterday, she asks for wipes again.  In my mind I wanted to scream.  But I opened my mouth to say "Okay" when she started.  It was something along the lines of "We asked for wipes and you only brought in a few and I can't be using other people's wipes on your children."  And just something about the way she said it made me snap a little bit...but I kept my calm. 

I said "I know I didn't bring you a lot, but I think what I brought should have lasted a few days.  I'm planning on bringing you more this week."  But she didn't listen to me...she just talked over me.  And because I was just getting angrier, I didn't listen to her - I just kept talking.

I left and just got angrier and angrier.  It makes me want to start my kids in a new daycare tomorrow.

But I know that wouldn't be good for them.  We've already made the decision that Ainsley should stay there until she starts school in September.  We just don't like the idea of moving her now and moving her again for school.

So 4 months...then Freddie will move to a more convenient location and Ainsley will start Kindergarten.  It's just so frustrating, but I do believe it's best for the kids.

I'll just have to bite my tongue until then.
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