I had trouble sleeping last night. I kept thinking about a book I read when I was about 19 years old. It was basically about the human form of Satan being born and growing up and then rising to a status of power and eventually becoming President of the United States. Obviously fiction. But interesting.
I know what you're thinking...super dramatic Jaime, get over it.
Don't worry, I don't think Donald Trump is Satan! But it's funny how that book would not leave my brain last night and I haven't thought of it in years and I can't even remember who wrote it or what it was called. Funny how our minds work.
I don't talk politics. If you comment on this post, I most likely will not respond. Especially if you try and argue with me or call me an idiot. I don't respond to crap like that. I am definitely never getting into a Facebook fight...if that ever happens, please someone slap me and delete my account forever!
It's not that I waver on what I believe or don't have strong convictions, it's just - what is the point? There is no evidence I could provide to a homophobic person that would convince him or her that two men should be allowed to marry. There is no story I could recite to convince a pro-life supporter of a woman's right to choose. There is no statistic I could give to convince a gun lover to give up any of those rights.
And there is nothing, I mean nothing that I could say about Donald Trump that a Trump supporter would not argue with me about. I care about my family and friends and I'm not interested in letting someone the likes of Donald Trump come between us. He is not worth that.
But I won't lie, today feels...scary, sad, unsettling, defining - not necessarily in a good way. It feels...surreal. Like how is this possible?
I'm worried. And I get it. I know there are those of you that absolutely believe Obama is the Antichrist and Hillary was his lackey. That she would have ruined us...just like I believe we are witnessing something horrible today. I am not one of those people who believes that you are a replica of Donald Trump because you voted for him.
I just don't happen to agree with you because I don't believe those things about Obama or Clinton. I love the Obamas. I voted for him twice...and not because I'm racist or stupid as I recently read on a bumper sticker (and seriously as a side note - WHY in the world do you say those kinds of things, it's just so ridiculous and just deepens the chasm in this country)...but because I believe in his policies and I really like him and I like that he's a role model for my children. And now? Well, unless he does a serious 180, I can't point to Trump and ask my kids to look up to him. To model themselves after him. I would have gladly pointed to Hillary Clinton and told Ainsley that she could be like her one day.
So I don't talk politics but here I am doing it...why? And I hate reading politcal posts, I hate whey FB fills up with them. So why would I do this?!?!?! Why have I joined the ranks of the annoying. Because I haven't been able to write anything. I just deleted 12 posts from my drafts box. TWELVE! Do you know how many people have begged me to write a new post? I've lost count. No matter how hard I tried to write about anything else I always came back to this. It's just weighing on me so heavy. So I'm hoping just dumping it and rambling about it for a few moments, I can move on.
I don't want him to fail, but I have very little faith. I really hope he proves me wrong. I hope that in 4 years, I say, "Wow he's done so much good, I have to vote for him."
I will support him and pray for him and hope beyond my doubt that he is a good leader. But I will fight if I have to. I will fight every single thing he does that I think is detrimental to our country and it's people. I'm calling my representatives today about Betsy DeVos, because I don't want my kids mixed up in anything she has to offer. I will fight a wall. Good grief I will go to Texas and chain myself to a bulldozer. A wall!!! I will stand with Muslims and homosexuals and transgenders and women and Jews and anyone who feels threatened. I believe that this country should be a safe haven. I believe in what it says on the Statue of Liberty. I believe that people come here because they are looking for a better life. And I believe that should be celebrated, not diminished.
There you have it, the one and only political post that I will most likely ever write. You won't hear me discussing this - well maybe if I've had a few drinks and you ask the right questions. I won't be shouting it from the roof tops. I won't be soiling my children's minds with Donald Trump slurs. But I will fight for my family. I will fight for this country. I will fight for what I believe in.
So bring it Mr. President...bring it. I didn't vote for you, I thought you were an absolute joke, but you are my President now and I expect great things from you. So much more than anything you've done or said in the past. We're all counting on it.