I'm sure there are those out there who think we're crazy. I can't even tell you how many times someone would comment on how perfect we were with one boy and one girl. That started when I found out Freddie was a boy.
"Oh perfect, one of each."
"You're so lucky to have on of each."
"Well now you can be done."
I would always nod and be polite but what I was thinking was "Who cares if I have one of each? And I plan on having more."
Until you've felt it, it's hard to explain the need to have another child. You just know there's another little soul out there that you're meant to be with. It's not really a decision or a conscious thought...at least it wasn't for me. It just was.
I have to say, that if you're having that feeling, go for it. Three is awesome. Everything is just so natural and easy at this point.
Now, let me be clear. Life is not always easy. Life is hectic and chaotic and crazy most days. But that is not because of the third child, it is just part of having three kids.
Cohen is pure joy. He is everything good about having a baby with none of the bad. I'm no longer a nervous, worried, always questioning mom. I feel like I can just enjoy every moment. I'm completely confident in my abilities and decisions.
I still worry about Ainsley. I worry that she's not reading at the right level. That she's not making enough friends. That she's not involved in enough, or involved in too much. When she was a baby I worried if she was eating enough, or too much. Was I producing enough milk? Why was she spitting up? Did we do tummy time long enough? Is she rolling over on time? Would she be able to wear this outfit long enough? Is she smiling, laughing, responding...blah, blah, blah.
Freddie was so different from Ainsley, that he humbled me. I thought I knew what I was doing, but he just never responded the same. So I worried that I wasn't bonding with him enough. That I wasn't meeting his needs.
Not with Cohen. He's 5 months old. He barely rolls over because I never put him on the floor. He smiles and laughs more than he cries. He eats when he wants and stops when he's done. And I know that he's just fine.
It's not that I didn't enjoy my other kids as infants. I did. But now, I feel like that's all I do is enjoy him. I don't let any worry or questions cloud that enjoyment. I've managed to keep two other kids thriving past 5 months, so how could I go wrong here?
Your first baby rocks your world.
Your second baby builds your character.
And your third baby solidifies your confidence that you are totally cut out for this whole motherhood thing.
If only we could have that third baby, first - imagine how awesome we'd be.
