The Late Birthday Letter

Dear Ainsley,

Okay, so I'm late...I mean your birthday was two days ago, so I have dropped the ball a bit.  I haven't written a blog post in over a month.  Let's see if I remember how.

So I always get to your birthday and think "I can't believe she's 2 (or 3, or 4, or 5...and now 6)."  I can't believe it.  I can't believe that 6 years and 3 days ago I wasn't a mom and then you made me one and now it's 6 years later.  How is that even possible?

In the hospital - 2 days old

When I look at you, I have to pinch myself.  I can't believe you're mine. I can't believe that I've done something so perfect.  When I see you with a group of kids I wonder if any of the other parents are bothered by your perfection.  I know it sounds really, really snooty and uppity, but I look at you and think you are just the smartest, funniest, most talented, most gorgeous little girl I've ever met.  How can everyone else not notice?  How can they not be so jealous of me for getting to spend every day with you?  I mean, I get to be your mom!  That's the most awesome thing I've ever gotten to do.

First Birthday party

You have grown up so much this past year.  You have morphed into a full on "kid."  Baby days are so far behind us.  Our life is dictated by your dance/school/cheerleading/playdate schedule.  You are a small person with opinions and ideas and dreams.

Second Birthday party

You amazed me in school this year.  I was so worried last summer.  You could only recognize a handful of letters.  You could only write and read your name.  I thought maybe we shouldn't send you to Kindergarten. Maybe we should give you a year in a formal preschool.  But once again, you shocked me.  Now you are reading and writing and adding and subtracting.  You tell me about insects and seasons and magnets and water and presidents and other languages and on and on and on.  You've sucked up every little bit of information those teachers have given you.  I'm beyond proud of you.

Third Birthday

You learned to ride your bike this year.  No training wheels...ever.  It just happened a week or so ago.  I almost started crying when I saw you do it.  Because I am a HORRIBLE teacher.  I have no idea how to teach a child to do anything.  My brain just won't go back that far and I have trouble connecting.  So I may have held the bike steady and I may have pushed you and I may have run beside you for a time, but really you figured it out all on your own.  You were so determined and you just wouldn't give up.  You just kept picking the bike up and trying again and again until you were cruising right on by me.  You get all the credit for it, you did it all on your own.

Fourth Birthday

You got a new baby brother this year.  You are such a little mommy...so caring and gently with him.  You'll hold him for hours if I let you and he loves you.  He'll cuddle right up against your chest and suck his hand.  He feels safe with you.  And speaking of little brothers, you are amazing with Freddie.  I probably don't tell you enough what an awesome big sister you are.  You are patient and kind when he is cranky and demanding.  You play whatever he wants and always give him his way...probably not the best idea, but it's just who you are.

Fifth Birthday

I am awestruck by you every day.  I'm so impressed with the little lady you are growing into and I couldn't be more proud.

Just shy of six years old

I love you Ainsley Bug.  Happy birthday.

Love,
Mommy